Prayer

So, I've had a really hard time with prayer for the past year. I mean, we're told that God is the divine eaves dropper, and that he knows our every thought/need/prayer. So what's the point in actually saying it out loud?

I also had a problem with praying for the wellness of people. I mean, thy will be done right? Just because 100 of us prayed for someone to be cured, does that really mean that they are going to be cured because so many people prayed for it? What if only 5 people prayed for it? Does that mean it wont get "passed"?

Prayer has been so confusing and so frustrating for me for a while... I could probably bring up more questions I had, but I can't remember them all now...

NOW - I absolutely love prayer. I love to pray after every bible study, during church on Sunday for "prayers of the people". I pray OUT LOUD pretty much every time. It's like the words just vomit out of my mouth.

But more than just church settings... I pray when I'm walking alone. I lean on God when times are good, and try to when times are bad... I pray at night before bed. I pray in the morning when I wake up... I pray constantly it seems.

The best part of it, is it isn't a chore. It isn't something I check off on my daily "To Do" list. It just happens, and I don't stop it ;)

I guess I've come to realize (thanks to the help of Pastor Dave and Kacey Hahn) that prayer isn't just to let God know what's up, because he already knows...

Prayer for me is a release of a burden, a shout of thanksgiving, a plea for help, and much much more. It's a time for me to "sort things out". A time for me to shut up and listen. A time for me to really care about others and practice loving them, and wanting the best for them.

It's still kind of confusing, and I can't completely wrap my mind around it, but what I know is I can't stop doing it...

Giggles for Jesus : P

Last night we had our Monday night study, but we didn't really have a topic to focus on. There were some random "hypothetical" situations that came up ;) but nothing too serious like topics we've done before like:

-Are we really loving someone if we aren't helping them grow
-- How do you avoid judgment when trying to help someone?

-Homosexuality: clergy and just in general and what the bible says about it

-Sex before marriage: Where does it really say that we shouldn't?

-Are different translations of the bible "picking and choosing" what you want to believe?
-- How are we supposed to know the "truth" from the bible when people can translate it different ways

-What does it mean to love?
-- Are we allowed to take a break from someone who constantly hurts us or isn't good to us, or are we supposed to continually love...
--- What does it look like to love ourselves first to help others?

Anyway, the point is, we talk a lot, we question, we dive in...

But last night, we just gathered. We chatted, laughed (snorted), hung out, sipped coffee, and just sat in a small community of 7 I believe...

I was thinking to myself (since I lead the study with Laura) "did we waste the precious time of other people" ... But after I thought it, I immediately wanted to slap myself. How could being in community with one another, to just laugh and smile and "detox" be a waste of time? I was reading everyone in the circle, and everyone seemed fine with it, and I know it especially helped one person in particular...

So I guess my conclusion is, we should all take some time in our days to just "giggle for Jesus". I mean we've all been so blessed (some of us "more" than others) so why not celebrate and laugh a little...

I had an incredible evening last night (until I hurt myself!! haha) and even though we didn't really "dive into" a study, we dove into laughing with one another and enjoying the community we were in. I don't see anything wrong with that ;) !!!!